Faith

A few days ago, a friend of mine sent me this blog post as a pick-me-up. It resonated with me on so many levels. And, it gave me a swift kick in the pants, making me realize that I’ve let my scripture reading slip to the point that I don’t really have encouraging verses stored in my head for the meager times. Sure, I have been reading the Bible on a fairly regular basis since getting my Kindle this summer, but it didn’t seem like it was enough. I was really feeling like, “Man, I need to get my spiritual act together!”

And then, it happened.

I was laying in bed, wide awake, at like 5 am. For some reason, all I could think about was chemo therapy and all of the long-term side effects. I started worrying, “What if my cognitive function is totally impaired?” “What if I forget how to sing?” “What if my hair never grows back?” And then I was overtaken with fear. This incredibly palpable fear. My rational self held on long enough to remind me that fear wasn’t going to accomplish anything. It also knew that this fear had such a firm grip on me that I wasn’t going to be able to shake it of my own accord.

So, I decided to pray.

I got maybe three words out, and then, it happened.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths.”

Those words popped into my head and overtook my prayer. My eyes flew open and I laid there, stunned. I heard the words so clearly, as if someone had just spoken them into my head. I almost felt like I needed to look around the room to see who had said the words. Hubs was a few inches away, sawing logs, so it clearly wasn’t him. As I laid there with my eyes open, staring at the hubster, the words just kept playing over and over in my head. After a few repetitions, I realized that the fear had disappeared.

And then I got the biggest smile on my face.

I was so pleased to realize that I DID, in fact, have a scripture tucked away in my brain! And I was quite convinced that God had spoken to me, using the scripture as His voice. The realization really was a thing of beauty. How could I not be grinning from ear to ear!

I must have laid awake for another half hour just thinking about that experience, drinking it in, relishing the beauty of it.

This doesn’t mean that I think I’ve arrived in the “tucking away scripture” department. Not even close. This experience has, however, encouraged me and has bolstered me on to dig in my Bible even further to find more gems to tuck away. I can’t wait to see what other scriptures God is going to use to inspire and uplift me throughout this journey!